Night of the living DEAD

Okay so we all want to be THAT parent...the cool one. You know the one with the house that Everyone LOVES to hang out at? So of course when my kids asked me to play night games last night I said YES!! Like any COOL Mom would.....I invited the whole neighborhood to come out and play and that they did. We had about 25+ kids ranging from 7 to 17. We divided into teams and dropped them off over a mile away in the DARK expecting them to get home without being caught. The Mom's drive around trying to spot the teams and if you get spotted you are OUT!! One of the Moms was a little nervous because our 7 year olds were playing and she was worried about them getting lost or left behind. I totally teased her and assured her that all will be well!! Well after about an hour all the teams but one had been found. The missing team that included my cute and super naive 10 year old daughter!!! The very one that had left her cell phone at home!! At first I was calm...but after driving around for 20 minutes yelling that the game was over and to come out with no sign of her...I started to FREAK OUT!! What a horrible parent I was for putting my sweet daughter into the the position of possibly being kidnapped or even worse....murdered. Was this Karma for teasing my friend was definitely coming back to bite me in the butt or what?? After contemplating calling the police...silently praying that she was okay...I finally I got the call that she and her friend had made it back home!! What a relief!! Seriously....I don't know if we will be playing night games ever again!! lol I was so scared!! Why is it that we as Parents are constantly pushing aside what we know is best for our kids just to please them in hopes that they will like us?? Why do we care if they like us anyways?? We are not their friends...we are their parents!! We are supposed to protect them and in return they will love us, right? lol Well time will certainly tell.....

Oops I did it again......

Did I ever mention that I was a PTA President?

Well....You know that old saying...."You dug your grave...now lie in it!"

I'm imagining that's what all my friends will be saying when they find out that I have agreed to be the PTA President again next year! lol

Okay....so I have a really, really hard time saying NO!!

Okay...so I have a really, really, REALLY hard time saying NO!!

Of course I am afraid....I mean, I'm already a lousy Mom and all, but to add on one more year of stress and chaos.....on top of my already CRAZY and BUSY life. I know.....I am nuts!! On the flip side....I think I will have an AMAZING Board!

So I know its been awhile....and surprisingly my excuse is NOT the PTA. Actually...maybe it is!

Regardless.....I am back and I have GREAT news!!

It's been 14 days since we have ate out!!!! Amazing right? I have cooked every single day!!!

I even bought myself a Crock Pot!!

You can pick your mouth up off the ground now!! lol

Sure I am craving Cafe Rio.......

and Betos, and Kneaders, and Panda Express......

and how I miss my dear friends at Little Caesars!

In case you forgot....we normally eat out atleast 4-5 times a week!

So ofcourse I am sooooooooo proud of this HUGE accomplishment!

As far as my kids....they haven't killed each other yet. So I'd say they are doing good? Not great....considering they still scratch, pinch, fight, yell, slap, and hot each other on a daily basis.

We are working on that......

Well I'm working on getting on Super Nanny! lol

Actually......while its on my mind!!

There is this kid on You Tube Stephen (Look up....user Wafflepwn)

Anyways...his brother has posted some videos of him having the most OFF THE WALL Tantrums!! When I first saw them...right away, I thought...oh that is sooo staged!!! However....I have been noticing my own kids having similar tantrums, so I am starting to wonder...could they be real? Either way..... I am really considering putting my own kids Tantrums on YOU TUBE!! LOL

Okay not really.....

But I do threaten and grab my phone like I am going to start video taping!

Am I the only one who is suffering from My Child Must Hate Me disorder?

So the other day I was checking up on my Oldest Daughters Facebook Page.....that's what good Mom's do right?

And yes, this is the same daughter I emotionally scarred in my last post! :(

This is a summary of what I found....

Daughters Status Update: Got home from Camping, FUN...but way behind in my Homework!

Comments that followed.....

Facebook Friend #1: Forget Homework, Go Play the Piano! :)

Facebook Friend #2: You better step up your game and play for the Pillow Concert!

Facebook Friend #3: No, you wanna get ur Homework done first so you get into the habit before High school....

My Daughters Response....and this is when it gets UGLY (For me)

I agree with all of you but I am not my Mother, I can not practice for the pillow concert, do ALL my missing homework and still eat, sleep, go to school and maybe have a life.

I wont lie...I've shed a few tears over this as I've pondered what exactly she meant by it. However.....it doesn't take a Brain Scientist to figure out that I have obviously given her some sort of complex by keeping myself so spread thin.

After I attended Woman's Conference at BYU I knew that I needed to Simplify my life. That I needed to eliminate the fluff that kept me so busy...unfortunately, there were a few things I had already committed myself for that I couldn't get out of.

Now I can admit my flaws...I don't cook, I don't like to clean, and I am definitely not crafty. The one thing I thought I excelled at as a Mom was the fact that I could balance so many things all at once. It breaks my heart to think that the one thing Ive considered myself good at as a Mom.....has actually came back to bite me in the butt!

So now what do I do?

I confronted her about it, and talked with her about how I would never want her to EVER compare herself to me, but somehow I get the feeling that it wasn't enough. I just cant seem to get her to realize that I am the one with the problem, not her. That she is perfect just the way she is and that its me who has the issues. Do I think some of this is stemming for her age...Ofcourse. I mean, I am sure at 11, she is just starting to figure out who she is and who she is not.

I know that...... I need to stop volunteering myself for so many different things...That I need to stop piling more and more on my plate.

What I don't know is how?

I mean....Is it always easier said then done? It just seems to me that at this point.... everyone is just so used to me saying Yes....with a big smile on my face, that I am usually the first person they come to when they need help. How do I stop the cycle that I have created for myself? Especially with the commitments I have already made for the year? Any ideas? I would love to hear them!!

The Return of the Prodigal Mom....

Okay, okay so I have been MIA lately! I wish I could tell you that no news is good news but sadly in this case, its not! I wont bother you with the boring details of how Cafe Rio swayed me to the dark side, but instead I will express my resentment...especially to my thighs, and start anew.

This past week has been a great week for me, and although I am no Domestic Goddess, I have to admit that after successfully cooking a authentic Italian dessert earlier this week, I do feel somewhat capable. Yes, Capable is the perfect word.....

Capable: having capacity or ability "Capable of winning" "Capable of hard work" and my favorite....... "capable of walking on two feet"

I am Capable, However I am not perfect.

Today was no exception.

Today I feel that I may have failed as a Mom.....and obviously I am feeling pretty lousy.

You see I have always been a peacemaker...the type that always puts a smile their face and looks the other way. My motto has always been Forgive and Forget...especially because it is near impossible for me to hold any type of grudge. Unfortunately, one of my daughters was not built that way, and the sooner I realize that she is not me, the better.

Today she needed me, and instead of backing her up...what did I do? I tell her that she needs to be the better person, that she is being negative and worst of all that if she didn't get out of that car and go into Activity days that I was going to ground her. Yep! I am sure that you are all shocked by my lack of compassion.

Well, as I drove home, with my sobbing daughter in tow, I realized just how off base I was. I mean, who says its better to always be the one to let it go, the follower, the one to put a smile on their face and look the other way, even if their feelings are being hurt. Looking back.....all that attitude got me...was walked all over.

Today I got a glimpse of what our Heavenly Father must feel for us each and everyday as we go through our trials. No matter what I said, there was nothing I could do to make it all better. There was absolutely no way of making the hurt go away. All I could do, and should have done from the start, was listen to her, hold her, love her, and let her cry.

Today I learned a valuable lesson, I learned that I am not always right.

Oops I did it again......

Okay so I will be honest...the last week has not been good!!

In fact if you look into our garbage can you will be disgusted by the site of Empty Cafe Rio containers, McDonald's Wrappers, Panda Express boxes and Del Taco Sauce..........and that's just to name a few!

I can admit when I have failed, so I admit it, I have failed!!!

However, I can also pick myself up from the ground, dust off my fat behind and start anew!! I even have a game plan.....Its called Dieting! That's right, I am starting a new diet, and with a new diet brings a new attitude against eating out! (Mostly because on this diet, its impossible to eat out!!)

Regardless...things are going to get a lot more healthy around here, real fast!!

Speaking of Health.....

This past week has SUCKED! A few months back (okay 5 months to be exact) I took my kids into the dentist. I didn't have dental insurance so when they told me how many cavities they all had, I think I started to cry! I decided to get dental insurance and wondered if I should wait out the 6 month waiting period! Unfortunately, being the lousy Mom I am, I never did sign up for the insurance and to top it off, I didn't get their cavities fixed either!! I know, I know, Mother of the Year!!

So anyways.....I hear about this Half Price Dentist office,that is actually a Dental School. I decide, oh what the heck, if it can save me $600.00, Why not?

So....into the dental Clinic we go!! After verifying that they are actual Dentist doing the work, and that its just the hygienists that are the students, I gave them the okay to go ahead with the dental work. After taking new X-rays and examining their mouths, they break the news to me that they have even more cavities then originally thought! I acted surprised since they had just been into the Pediatric dentist and all!! (They didn't need to know it was 5 months ago)

After assessing the new damage, the bill ended up being as much as it would have cost me if I had just went ahead and had them fixed at the Pediatric dentist!! So at this point I'm feeling even lousier then normal.......thinking Oh my goodness....here we are at some dental Clinic.....where there isn't even a TV on the ceiling for my poor little kiddos to look at!! Oh the Pity I was feeling for them!!

I have however decided that even though sometimes as Mom I suck, sometimes I rock!

Just today my oldest, most dramatic, daughter tried to convince me she was dying. Of course I knew she wasn't dying, but right away I knew it was something, in fact I would have bet that it was Strep! So after I let her know how mad I was going to be if I took her in and it was nothing, off we went to the Doctor! Wouldn't you know, I was right! It was strep......and for a few glorious seconds, when the Dr. told me I was right, I felt like the best Mother ever!!!

There is Hope......

I would have thought.....

that my new found adventure would definitely be easier in the Summer!
No school, no piano, no dance.....NO WAY....I'm finding it harder then ever to keep my goal of no fast food!! Even though we have ate out WAY more then I would like to admit this past week, I do have lots of good excuses like... "We've been on vacation!", "It was my Birthday!" or "Eclipse (nuff said)"

Even though I have had my weak moments, I think I have been doing pretty dang good! Of course it helps when you spend half the week roughing it in the wilderness! Sure we had our fair share of Bear Lake Shakes, Old Ephraim Pizzas and Chocolate Covered Raspberries, but there were tin foil dinners, Weenie roasts and S'mores too!! (I assume they count as home cooked!)

I am really excited to continue on my quest! Especially because I received the BEST birthday gift ever.....



I am so excited to try these recipe books out!! They look so simple and are exactly what I need!!

(Thanks Alison!!)

So besides the few times I was told I was hated this week....things were looking pretty good!!

That was until I rushed home from the Lake (on my birthday mind you) to get my kids into the Dr. before the weekend started! We roll into the Dr's office straight from the lake, I run in with my 2 kids that needed to be seen, looking like complete scrounges, dirty feet, Mosquito bites , the awful smell of camp fire protruding form our clothes.

It was so embarrassing, I couldn't help repeating myself to everyone we saw......

"I am soooooo sorry!! We just came straight form Bear Lake, we really meant to stop at home and take showers, but ran into awful traffic"

I seriously said this over, and over and over....

To the secretary, to the nurse, to the Doctor, to the Pharmacist tech at the store, to at least 4 or 5 complete strangers!!

It wasn't till my oldest daughter said "Mom, why do you keep telling strangers that we just came from Bear Lake? Do you really think they care Mom, they're STRANGERS!! " that I stopped! lol

Of course she thought I stopped apologizing over and over again because she made such a great point! The real reason however, was that I was so stunned when I got the grand total from the Pharmacist that I thought I was going to kill over right there and then.

Seriously?

$230.00??

For what???

Some measly eye drops , nose spray and glorified children's Benadryl??

I was about ready to pull the old....

Oh crap, I must have forgot my wallet" and run, routine and just go on letting my kids face look like a swollen red mess.....but realized that it probably wouldnt be the best thing to do, considering my quest to be a better Mom and all!!

So I took a deep breathe and quietly sang Happy Birthday to Me, Happy Birthday to Me, as I swiped my debit card!

Do you know what I could have bought myself for $230.00???? If this act of sacrafice doesnt show how much I love my kids.....I dont know what does!! lol

Meal Planning Sucess....

Well sort of!!

When I woke up yesterday, I knew that the first thing I had to was plan the meals for the rest of the week and go grocery shopping while I had a chance. The problem was that once my kids woke up they would want to come with me.

Its not that I cant handle the kids coming, its just that the littlest one is at the horrible tantrum age,and although I can handle ignoring her (throw yourself on the ground in the middle of the store until you get candy) routine, everyone else in the store can't! What is it about a child screaming bloody murder on the ground that makes everyone glare at you in disgust like your some sort of lousy Mom. Of course you have the ladies that empathize with you and give you words of wisdom, and then there are my favorite ones (mostly little old grouchy ladies) that make fun of the kid by pointing at them and calling them a little brat! lol True story!

Regardless...I was out the door and child free! Unfortunately this meant that I didn't have the time to make a meal plan before I left, so I was going to have to wing it.

I loaded my cart full of the groceries I needed to make a few choice meals and headed for home. I felt confident that this week was going to go well with my cupboards filled with all the new groceries.

Sadly....

I still lack one key factor in meal planning...called execution!!

This is what is going to haunt me if I don't get it together. You see, when I left yesterday to see Jacob Eclipse (The best movie ever), I didn't make anything for the hubby and the kids to eat while I was gone. Shocking huh? Don't get me wrong....I had intentions to slow cook some french dip so that they could eat dinner while I was gone but I just simply ran out of time.

Put down your pitchforks....as soon as the movie was over at 7:00 I rushed home quick and once home, I made things right......

Hot Dogs Anyone??? lol

It was quick, it was easy and best of all, it wasn't eating out!!

Tonight will be better! It's 8am and I've already have planned whats for dinner. Of course its Girls night out for me, which means I will be eating Cafe Rio,everyone else however will be enjoying tuna Casserole